Sooo… I haven’t written a post in two months and I think it’s about time. I don’t know why I haven’t written, I had started writing a few weeks ago and everything I wanted to write left my mind the minute I started writing. TRAGIC!!
So a lot has happened in these two months: my oldest son started Pre K, I started working at the school he goes to as his music teacher, we both got sick, Gene Wilder died (one of my faves),etc, etc. So I am pretty sure I am missing a few things but I don’t care enough right now to remember. Yeah that’s how I feel right now.
So today I was driving home from picking up my youngest and the gas light turns on and I start crying. I’m listening to a song “I surrender, I surrender all” and the gas light flashes on… Really?! Really?! I have this heavy feeling in my chest like someone is stepping on my chest. Yep that’s me right now. IJS. I don’t know why I am feeling this way… actually I think I do but … Anyways, so have you ever been surrounded by many but still feel lonely? Well that’s how I feel. I have great friends, loving family, wonderful kids and an amazing husband, yet I feel alone.
In the middle of this loneliness, I had an encounter with Holy Spirit. I was driving to my small group this morning when I saw a sign for church for sale so I stopped took a pic and sent it to my husband. After small group my husband text me letting me know that my pastor had been at that same church praying yesterday. So I decided to stop by the church and pray. And when I started praying I felt this overwhelming feeling and I started crying. I kept crying until I drove away from the church. Amazing right?? Might not be amazing to you but to me , to have an encounter like that and to feel His presence and to know I am not alone was amazing! So why did I feel alone this afternoon?! I honestly do not know the answer to that question, but I do know that God is with me and He will not forsake me in this desert that I am standing in. I don’t know what God is wanting in my life at this moment but I definitely know I want a part of what He has for me. What that looks like I don’t know but I want to see what it looks like.
Alone or not, running on empty or on a full tank it doesn’t matter because God has my back.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6
Thanks for reading! Til next time. Like, share and meditate.